So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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