Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
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