dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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