Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
i out mim tonsoeep
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
