bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Randomize
