Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
