it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
