big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
