I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
A+ Viking dick
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize