I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
