I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
