"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
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