I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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