you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
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