its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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