I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
