I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
