I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
