i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
stop calling my apartment porn island.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Randomize
