i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
