I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
