turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
God gave him joint rollers for hands
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
