I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
