Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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