he thought i was a dude.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
