so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
