she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
