There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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