I just gift wrapped bread.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
