When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Randomize
