i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
