I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
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