When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
