I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Randomize
