She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
