It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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