She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
