um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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