I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize
