omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
