Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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