What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Randomize
