never play flip cup with pint glasses
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Randomize
