sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Pants are for mortals
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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