So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
Randomize
