So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Randomize
