I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
