She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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