I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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