Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
You're a disaster
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